“There is not one big cosmic meaning for all; there is only the meaning we each give to our life, an individual meaning, an individual plot, like an individual novel, a book for each person.”
–Anaïs Nin
Why am I here?
If you haven’t asked yourself this question before, maybe it’s time to give it a ponder. Really, why are we here? To run around like ants building little hills, pointlessly? Or are we here for something much deeper?
Having faced my mortality in a big way, I find this question pressing. What if I die and “they” tell me I’ve got to come back further down the food chain because I so didn’t get the point.
The other day I asked a friend what he thinks the purpose of his life is. He said he’s never really given it any thought before. After a few minutes he said that he loves his work and that maybe the reason he hasn’t given the question any time is that he is living his purpose everyday. He believes that what he does is of great service in helping people relieve their physical pain and increase their mobility and he takes tremendous pride in doing the work to the best of his abilities.
I have ideas of why I’m here. I may be way off target, but I hope I am leaving a tiny positive trail in my efforts. If you find yourself living life by rote instead of by heart with a sense of purpose, give this big kahuna question some brain space.
What is my ‘iconic’ mark on the world?
What I mean by this is, if your friends were asked to write a brief (very honest) bio on you, what would they say? Who are you and what imprint do you leave on others?
Would they say you are …
Passionate?
A conformist?
Wild & crazy?
An optimist?
A grumbler?
Playful & bubbly?
Staid?
An energy vampire?
A ray of sunshine?
The question is not about the good opinion of others, it is about whether or not your footprint on the world is what you imagine it to be.
Is there a better way to do life (for me)?
My sister’s life, from my perspective, is one big, hairy stress ball. She is a single mum with zero spousal support (both financially and for time off) and she runs a demanding and hectic practice as a behavioral consultant. She manages two homes; one for business and one she and her teenagers live in along with assorted hockey billets. She frequently sounds frazzled and overwhelmed. But when I make suggestions of ways to change her schedule and workload, we eventually come to the point where she says she doesn’t want to change things. Not the way I’d do it, but that’s her choice. (Since I wrote this, she put it out to the Universe that she needed some testosterone-type help and four men have appeared to assist with the house in a big way. Now that’s manifesting.)
If you have an area of your life that isn’t working properly or effectively, or if there is something that is perpetually a source of stress or anxiety, maybe there’s a better way. We develop longstanding habits that may not always be to our advantage and may be a lot more work than need be.
There are as many ways to do something as people on the planet because we all have a different point of view. I am interested in how other cultures do things in case I may discover a better or more pleasurable way to do something. Asking friends how they handle a certain faction of life can sometimes reveal a whole new perspective.
What’s right about me?
We are assailed with the notion that we must vigilantly look for what is wrong with us; what needs to be tucked, de-wrinkled, fixed, toned down, toned up, whipped into shape, changed, and improved.
And I’m the number one culprit of comparing myself to others and asking “what’s wrong with me,” because I feel I’m falling short.
I heard Teal Swan talk about worthiness in a way I’d not thought of before. When we are babies, we just sleep, eat, cry, and poop. And the people around us adore us in awe. We don’t have to do anything or be anything or have any grand achievement to be loved or to be worthy. Just our being here is enough. Fast forward … even if we never do another thing again, we are still worthy. Just our being here is enough.
Have you ever written yourself a love letter about what’s right, wonderful, and amazing about you? Neither have I. But I’m about to do one. What if you, as you are, is exactly what the world needs right now?
What does my body want?
I was introduced to this idea through a peculiar guy with a peculiar process called Access Consciousness. I’ve listened to his Google Hangouts and in his body series he suggests asking your body what it wants for its ultimate health and happiness. I was suffering from Sunday sentimentality on the weekend, so early in the day I asked my body what it wanted. Man, did it surprise me.
I made myself a steak dinner (I Googled that loudmouth, chef Ramsay, on how to do a perfect pan fried steak) complete with salad, veggies à la béarnaise and baby roasted potatoes. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve drank alone, but the urge to crack a bottle of Apothic Red struck.
I drank a glass. Then another. If you know me, that’s usually the limit. I searched YouTube for my favorite songs (check out the sizzling X-rated version of Earned It–use your ear buds for full effect). I poured just a little more. I danced around. Then I found the songs I used to sing. I sang. And I cried. And I sang some more. And cried. Another little splash. Another song.
I watched the time tick by and even though it was a “school night,” I didn’t stop. I sang Lara Fabian and Celine, then Reba and Trisha Yearwood. I sang all the way back to Elton John’s Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy from 19-bloody-74. Thanks to my patient mother who sat and wrote out every word with me, I can still remember the weird-assed lyrics to that album.
I drank ¾ of a bottle of wine and stayed up way past even my night owl bedtime, but in the morning, I felt great. No hangover. And my mind got quieter. A lot quieter.
It sounds strange, but sit for a few quiet minutes and ask your body what it wants. It may well surprise you–but do not ask if you’re not going to listen. The key is to act no matter your regular ‘rules.’
Now this one’s a biggie. It’s a question Steve Jobs lived by for 33 years.
If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?
Jobs claimed that whenever the answer was “no” for too many days in a row, he knew he needed to change something. This question likely seems like a tall order, but we all know life is fleeting and there are no guarantees to how many more days we have. With that in mind, it’s a question worth asking. You may not change your life overnight, but it gives you awareness: how we spend our days is how we spend our lives.
Just a few more deep thoughts from a Fish Called Wanda … have a brilliant day.
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Post © Wanda St.Hilaire
